I've started about four different posts and had a door slam itself shut in my brain's face about four lines in each time. It is frustrating, mostly because I have been sorely deprived, creatively, over the past few months. I mean, I realize that it is not genius that I have been spewing forth over the past 3 years on this blog- if anything it is more like internet diarrhea. I am obviously grammatically challenged; my writing isn't terribly unique or even readable at times and certainly no one expects me to be writing professionally. Ever. But it has been a relief to me and that feeling of relief after creating a post overrides my slight feeling of shame (also like diarrhea).
But over the past few weeks, I have been stuck. A huge part of it is that I often am not able to stay focused long enough to form complete sentences, much less a complete series of thoughts strung together in a semi cohesive post. This personal flaw has always been present in my life, but lately it has taken a turn for the worse. I am constantly stopping in the middle of conversations and finding myself in a complete haze, wondering what the hell I was talking about. I mean that literally. I'll start talking and then totally lose my train of thought mid sentence. All. The. Time. Perhaps it is slightly poetic and symbolic of the fact that, in the giant, overall, "What is life all about anyway and why can't I live it 15 pounds skinnier?" picture, nothing anyone says ever truly matters - it's just words words words and most people don't give a damn anyway. But I don't care! I still want to have a constant flow of those inconsequential words! But so far the only word I can get out without hesitation is "Fuck". Ex: Where the fucking fuck is my fuckity flow? It's disappearance has left me blocked up worse than an old person surviving on a diet of biscuits and candy corn.
Basically, I need a mental laxative.
*I took me almost 3 hours to create this post. No foolin'.
When I was 14, my mom confessed to me that she thought Prince was sexy.
Not this prince,
not this one,
not even this one
THIS Prince.
Well after several glimpses on late night television and (indiscriminate noise) years later, I have made the command decision to watch Purple Rain. The whole. Thing. As far as I can tell, it either has something to do with global warming or is a sexy musical vehicle for actor Rainn Wilson is a semi autobiographical film about Prince. I am sure it will be silly melodramatic fun (my favorite kind of fun, I tell you what)- so much so that I am debating doing another running commentary, kind of like my Let's All Go To The Lobby post.
I don't know though. I can't tell if I would get as worked up over Purple Rain as I was over that mumbley, raging inducing boinkfest, 9 1/2 Weeks.
So I watched a clip from the movie, where some girl wears hideous purple lipgloss favored by porn actresses of 90's, Prince humps a speaker and Steve Harvey looks super pissed.
Warning: This is a musical theatre post. I call Barbra Streisand "Babs" and I talk about belting and a woman named Fanny, with absolutely no irony and no attempt to hide the light of my musical loving heart under a bushel. If it is too much for you, I understand. I'll smell you next round!
I am a big old geek for Funny Girl. I know, it is beyond cliche', that the awkward and silly theatre girl would love that big Babs-filled musical about the tragic comedienne, Fanny Brice - but there you have it. I love the mess out of it, and yes, my heart breaks for Fanny, and yes, I have stood my underwear in my bedroom at 2am and sung the title song, with tears streaming down my face, amazed at my own brilliance- until the cat comes around the corner and stares up at me with "What fresh hell is this?" eyes.
I have heard tell that there is a revival, starring Ms Lauren Ambrose, of Six Feet Under fame. Like most people, I am surprised, but very interested to see what she'll bring to the table. And here is a little bit of truth telling, followed by an explanation, and then I am moving on. I am so very glad that we dodged the Glee bullet. Now, this may steam some people's mustaches to hear that I am not a fan of Lea Michelle's seeminglyneverendingcampaign to play this role, but frankly, I am not interested in shallow Barbra Streisand imitations. Perhaps this is a conscious choice on the behalf of Ms Michelle, seeing how she is currently playing a naive teenager with stars in her eyes and a pop rendered showtune in her heart. Most teenage actors start out imitating a performance instead of interpreting a character. So, I'll give her the benefit of a doubt that this was what she is trying to capture- nonetheless, I am super happy I do not have to witness her pull faces and fake tears throughout "My Man"*.
I really can't blame young actresses wanting to claim a little bit of that original performance for their own. It truly was iconic. But honestly- have you seen/heard the real Ms Fania Borach, aka Fanny Brice? Several of the songs in the musical, Funny Girl, were real standards of Ms Brice's. For true!
A quick background for those of you who don't know what the doo doo I am talking about: Fanny Brice was a real woman.She was a comedienne, singer, theater, film and radio actress in the early part of the 20th century. She was most famous for her time spent as a performer in the Ziegfeld Follies and her radio career that she had up until her death at age fifty nine.
Thirteen years later, a young unknown named Barbra Streisand blew everyone away with her portrayal of Ms Brice in the stage and later film musical, Funny Girl, which centered on Fanny's rise to fame, while her personal and romantic life tragically crumbled around her. Like any biopic/musical- it was expanded upon and fictionalized, but one thing was definitely true - Fanny spent most of her adult years in love with a gentleman who was more sponge than man. I'm telling ya- look it up. It is not uncommon that a successful comedienne would have a tragic love life, but Fanny's is the most famous story and to this day, the title song still kills me.
Please, find me a character actress who hasn't felt like Fanny in her personal life at least once and I will buy you drink. Two drinks, even. I know I have come out of a few relationships with this song lodged in the back of my mind. Sue me. (Please don't sue me. Blood, turnips, you get the picture.)
A few months ago I found a copy of one of Ms Brice's comedy albums based on her most famous character, Baby Snooks, but was unable to purchase it at the time. Thanks to the interweb and youtube, however, I can dig up all of her old hits, performed by the funny girl herself.
These are ones that also appear in the musical Funny Girl. It is interesting not so much to compare the two performances, but to see how Streisand took these original numbers and filled them out, while still staying true to the real person.
And of course, I would be loath to neglect to mention her most famous number, "My Man". The depth of feeling presented in this one song truly allows you into her private life, where things simply were not that "funny".
Years after her death, Barbra Streisand took this song, made it her own heart wrenching and belt-tastic number, and a legend was (re)born...
*This makes the bold assumption that I could ever afford to go see this production. Oh- poverty** and insomnia has made me delusional.
**Poverty, she says. I've got my coffee and my netflix. I'll stop exaggerating my need for money. Unless you feel compelled to donate some. Well hey then, I'll gladly break out my Dickensian garb and do bell kicks while you drop coins into my pay pal account. Thank yer. Thank yer kindly.
My stars and garters. Okay- I only posted twice last month. This is not good. I really do have several subjects that I wanted to talk about (not just blenders and music videos, although I certainly know the blinding, magnificent appeal of both of those topics), but it has become just so damn hard to sit down and focus my thoughts for more than 10 minutes at a time I sure could go for some coffee...
Bwaugh? Oh, staying focused and being a productive blogger. Yep, I am neither of those things. I do so apologize and promise that I am working on bettering myself in both areas. Please, accept this video of a talking cat as part of my apology- the part that distracts you from my poor blogging skills.
