Sunday, January 25, 2009


My Dove chocolate advised me to "Forget the potholes in the road and enjoy the journey instead!". And then it tried to confuse me by tasting so sweet in my mouth. Okay, Dove, okay. But my journey isn't all delicious chocolate and accepting bits on wisdom written on tinfoil. Believe me, I wish it were! I've got nothing but lemons, but no sugar!
Lemon: Finances are a major, if not the biggest, headache.
Lemon: Cold weather- my limbs are frozen!
Lemon: Try as I might, I can't help but feel played. Actions speak louder than words.
Lemon: My impatient pants are suffocating me!
Lemon: Dad pointed it out- my self image is in shambles.
Lemon: Distance
Lemon: Time
Lemon: Depression and anxiety
Note on that, I always hate to admitting to that specifically- as if I'm ashamed of my own humanity. But it shouldn't be so shameful, or such a huge secret - many kids suffer from depression and anxiety. It doesn't mean I walk around with tears tattooed on my cheeks or that I'm going emo or anything. Never, I swear!

So in spite of all this (and the lemons that we won't mention), I am trying to stay focused. Focused on making this a positive year and a turning point. There are several things to be excited about- number one....
OBAMA OH MAMA! I am thrilled, I tells ya, thrilled! What a joyful time, to feel an overwhelming feeling of hope, not just me, but the majority of people in the country! Such positive vibes have got to create positive actions!
I also am excited about several films, music, etc. I look forward to having extra cash so I can get myself to the theatre and once more feel a part of that community of people supporting art.
And I do have a plan. It is just figuring out how I will execute that first big step.
If I see it, it will be easier to believe it.

I'm sick of talking and I'm ready to start seeing.


Lydia said...

Always listen to the chocolate! And hey, if you've got some Dove chocolate, life can't be all that bad!

You've got some lemons, sure, but you're the sugar, sugar!!

PS Sometimes impatient pants are a good thing.

Jessica said...

No, you and the friends who are so considerate are the sugar. Thanks for always keeping it real with me!

Lydia said...

That's what I do. I keep it real.

PS Here if you order 'lemonade' in a restaurant they give you Sprite. What?????????????????

Siobhan said...

Chocolate will never guide you wrong. NEVER! And I used to not be a fan of chocolate...and now it's won me over. It's that powerful.

Finances blow. I understand this better than you can imagine. But...sometimes you just have to take that step anyway. Be as prepared as you can and take the leap and have faith that everything will work itself out in the end.

You realize I have to say this, right? Seeing as I'm about to take my own big leap in about 7 months. So, really, I'm trying to convince myself along with you.

joyful girl said...

i love that collage! and it reminds me of our old favorite muppets song:
(obviously pirated, which i don't agree with BUT it's really hard to find this video online!)

you can learn a lot from fozzie & kermit - they know their final destination but on the way are totally lost, and not afraid. they know they'll be fine because they've got friends. they took a LEFT turn at the fork in the road, when we all know that's the less-traveled direction. despite the lemons, and the occasional sprite that shows up when you're expecting lemonade, you're on the right track & your chocolate is wise.
love you