I adore my apartment. I adore my apartment building and I adore my neighborhood. Yes, because I live in an urban area I sometimes have to contest with the occasional crazy (but mostly harmless) homeless gentleman shuffling outside my window, or the occasional schizophrenic (but mostly harmless) neighbor getting carted off to treatment... but for the most part, my home is a gem. I'm in the city, I'm close to parks, I'm with the other urbanites and fellow artsy fartsy types AND I have little trees and birds outside my windows.
Except for when I have to walk through the alley behind my building.
"Um, then don't walk through alleys, Dum Dum" would be an altogether appropriate suggestion, however my response is that the laundry room is in the building next door and that is the only way to get to it and "are you up for buying me my own washer/dryer set, you judgey YupYup?"
It's not that it is a super shady alley; it's that sometimes after dark I hear the underbelly of my neighborhood come out and start feeding on each other or sometimes (tonight) they start growling at me as I go to check on my bf's shirts.
Solution? Mace and a healthy dose of Foxy Brown?
Nope. Because when JessBecause comes to town, all the brothers laugh as they watch her run away, screeching like a newborn fennec fox.