Saturday, November 8, 2008

The Alive Place

Who is freaked out by the xbox commercials? Me. I'm sorry, I prefer the back of my own head to an open air concert/theme park. So, I prefer honesty to dishonesty, yes? I prefer people who are aggressive and tactful, rather than passive aggressive and vague. And normally, I prefer things that are broken, like yours truly, to things that are whole... But lately I have an undeniable attraction to wholeness. And it is very very unnerving... unsettling. So how does someone with anxiety issues learn how to not let her own fear control her? I'm not sure! But the always amazing Forsythe said to me last night that I should find the edge. The edge between pleasure and pain; between risk and safety. That I can't be all risk or all safety. Just trust that I feel good where I am and that I'm facing what I'm facing.
This is why the girl is genius. Okay, she's actually a genius for more valid reasons then being smarter than her best friend. But basically it all comes down to what I keep telling myself to do, which is to live in the moment. Live on the fucking edge! As Forsythe called it, the sometimes ambiguos sometimes contradictory territory... which challenges you, makes you grow, the alive place.
Okay, so that's where I'm going. I can't go to the future or the past right now, but I can always go to the alive place. Or, as Mr Roger Miller put it....

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

...and i reckon this makes YOU a giant, too, cupcake. :o)